He reveals deep and hidden things;
he knows what lies in darkness,
and light dwells with him.
Daniel 2:22.
Darkness...he knows.
Let's face it, we all have our own dark corners, out dark rooms, where our greatest struggles lie dormant, or is being wrestled with without any witnesses in sight (except for God though, who's watching from the sidelines).
We've all unfortunately witnessed this darkness consume some of our very own brothers and sisters, or where it is revealled in the light. Heck we see it in pastors, and fathers, and even mothers.
Becoming a leader is no joke, but a great risk.
You carry your darkness into a new level, and with each progression, the difficulties in revealing this darkness becomes everso troublesome.
We're all aware that we must fight this darkness on a day-2-day basis, but there is that added fear that the darkness may consume or show itself before the battle is done.
We've all been guilty of putting our expectations on others, unfarily to boot.
We see someone in service of the Lord, in the ministry who betrays him/herself and God to his/her darkness, only for him to be condemned by those who were not-so-long ago in awe of him/her.
They condemn him not just because of thier dissapointment in the person, but usually because they expected the person to carry thier expectations, to give them hope that "yes, it is possible".
But that person failing brings them back to the reality that they must face thier own "demon" to deal with, and it's not always easy to rid of.
Such is the curse of Adam upon us all.
Luckily for us, the grace of God, through Christ Jesus is more than suffecient ton either strengthen us against the battle, or see the good in us when no one else does.
Wednesday 11 July 2007
Monday 2 July 2007
The Lost Art Of Worshi.
A few days ago, I read an article on christianitytoday.com about psalms and prayer.
The article discussed the narrative arc of the book of Psalms, and how it began with lamentation, and ended in rejoice. How sometimes we aren't "in" prayer and simply going along with the flow due to burdens on our heart, yet we can't express this during worship as it somehow seems ungrateful.
I was so happy to read this.
So many people have told me how "joyful" and beautiful the prayers of Psalms, but honestly, half the time, all I could read was the lamentings and sorrows of David, then the other half was full of joy.
Why is it that all worship in Churches focus on just rejoice? Do we not suffer? Are all days painfree?
I'm guilty of sometimes going through the motions when my heart is not in it. We can rejoice alone or in fellowship, but why do we only lament by ourselves? In solitude? with no one else?
Even David lamented. It would be great to lament in fellowship, to know that I don't have to be in sorrow by myself and that we all suffer for the glory of God. Rather than going through the motions, we can all poor out our sorrows to God in fellowship, this in turn, would help us appreciate each other more and give even more glory to God in our worship, as we can all appreciate the challanges of life together, and understand what God is doing in all our lives.
Sometimes, it's good to go down to the velley together, so we can appreciate how high the mountain is together.
The article discussed the narrative arc of the book of Psalms, and how it began with lamentation, and ended in rejoice. How sometimes we aren't "in" prayer and simply going along with the flow due to burdens on our heart, yet we can't express this during worship as it somehow seems ungrateful.
I was so happy to read this.
So many people have told me how "joyful" and beautiful the prayers of Psalms, but honestly, half the time, all I could read was the lamentings and sorrows of David, then the other half was full of joy.
Why is it that all worship in Churches focus on just rejoice? Do we not suffer? Are all days painfree?
I'm guilty of sometimes going through the motions when my heart is not in it. We can rejoice alone or in fellowship, but why do we only lament by ourselves? In solitude? with no one else?
Even David lamented. It would be great to lament in fellowship, to know that I don't have to be in sorrow by myself and that we all suffer for the glory of God. Rather than going through the motions, we can all poor out our sorrows to God in fellowship, this in turn, would help us appreciate each other more and give even more glory to God in our worship, as we can all appreciate the challanges of life together, and understand what God is doing in all our lives.
Sometimes, it's good to go down to the velley together, so we can appreciate how high the mountain is together.
Thursday 28 June 2007
Don't worry....
There's nothing better than prayer in the morning.
I'll admit that starting my day with prayer and bible study is something I'm not consistant in. I can be like the seed that lets the weeds of this world chokes me, from Jesus' seed parable. If I wake up late, then I tend to rush, making sure I please everyone, from myself to my boss(es), but not God.
However, I must overcome and discipline myself and put myself under submition, if not for my own sake, then for God and his plans.
This can be the hardest part, but the hardest disciplines are always the most important. It builds character, a character of Christ, who was disciplines and submitted himself to the will of The Father.
When you start off your day in Christ, everything feels A-OK. Granted there are so many challenges ahead, and so many things to do. But when you know you've done the right thing, to set your day on Christ, you have no worries of what life throws at you. Because in the grand scheme of things, it's all so minor.
Thank you Father for making my day based on you.
May I keep deligent and focused on your word, and then to meditate on it.
May I draw myself closer to your heart, by each day.
Thank you.
I'll admit that starting my day with prayer and bible study is something I'm not consistant in. I can be like the seed that lets the weeds of this world chokes me, from Jesus' seed parable. If I wake up late, then I tend to rush, making sure I please everyone, from myself to my boss(es), but not God.
However, I must overcome and discipline myself and put myself under submition, if not for my own sake, then for God and his plans.
This can be the hardest part, but the hardest disciplines are always the most important. It builds character, a character of Christ, who was disciplines and submitted himself to the will of The Father.
When you start off your day in Christ, everything feels A-OK. Granted there are so many challenges ahead, and so many things to do. But when you know you've done the right thing, to set your day on Christ, you have no worries of what life throws at you. Because in the grand scheme of things, it's all so minor.
Thank you Father for making my day based on you.
May I keep deligent and focused on your word, and then to meditate on it.
May I draw myself closer to your heart, by each day.
Thank you.
Wednesday 27 June 2007
The "S" Destiny
One of the main thoughts that has troubled me for months, maybe a few years, is my biggest fear.
Many Christians like to proclaim hell as the ultimate fear, but I'm not big on the whole "hellbound" evanglism, because although important, I feel it can cause a "ceiling effect", where people do the minimum to avoid hell and that's it, making it an "extrinsic" faith where rules and dogma helps us to avoid God's wrath, rather than having an "intrinsic"/intimate relationship with God (sort of the comparison between living by the law, and living by Jesus).
No, my fear is something all the more daunting. I call it the "S" destiny, as in "S" for "Solomon" and/or "Samson", two men of God that left this world never quite achieving the massive potential that was given to them by God.
Over the last few months, I am proud but humble enough to believe that God has given me good potential, but the lingering fear that I may never maximise it exists.
If such men like wise old Solomon and strength-defying Samson couldn't achieve thier potential, how can I?
On ther other hand, they didn't have Jesus the same way we do today.
Yes I know that us Christians should have no fear, but I cannot deny that this lingeres somewhere at the back of my head. What if I fail God? What if I shame him? To know that I somehow hindered Gods master plan IS a scary thought.
And I'm aware that he will always love me always, and will take care of my burdens and give me rest (Matthew 11: 28), but I still fear.
Over the next few years, I must give my all to ensure that I am fully in alignment with Gods will for the church. If I am to fail, not only do I fail myself, but I fail God and many of the youths. WOW.
Ironically, a part of me lavishes at the challenge. What an opportunity, to work for the Lord Almighty. Really and truly, this isn't about me is it? If I can't deliver the goods, I'm sure God has another person to do the job (ala David to Samuel).
It means I have to fix up, I need to become more disciplined and focused, if not for my sake, then for the youth, for the church.
"Heavenly Father,
I commit myself to you Oh Lord.
I deliver myself as a sacrifice, just as you did for me.
You came and gave yourself up to death for my sake, now it's time to do the same for you.
I pray that I can one day be the man that you want me to be, that my will and yours Jesus may become one, just as you and The Father are one.
I commit myself to you Lord Jesus,
In Jesus name I pray.
Amen."
Many Christians like to proclaim hell as the ultimate fear, but I'm not big on the whole "hellbound" evanglism, because although important, I feel it can cause a "ceiling effect", where people do the minimum to avoid hell and that's it, making it an "extrinsic" faith where rules and dogma helps us to avoid God's wrath, rather than having an "intrinsic"/intimate relationship with God (sort of the comparison between living by the law, and living by Jesus).
No, my fear is something all the more daunting. I call it the "S" destiny, as in "S" for "Solomon" and/or "Samson", two men of God that left this world never quite achieving the massive potential that was given to them by God.
Over the last few months, I am proud but humble enough to believe that God has given me good potential, but the lingering fear that I may never maximise it exists.
If such men like wise old Solomon and strength-defying Samson couldn't achieve thier potential, how can I?
On ther other hand, they didn't have Jesus the same way we do today.
Yes I know that us Christians should have no fear, but I cannot deny that this lingeres somewhere at the back of my head. What if I fail God? What if I shame him? To know that I somehow hindered Gods master plan IS a scary thought.
And I'm aware that he will always love me always, and will take care of my burdens and give me rest (Matthew 11: 28), but I still fear.
Over the next few years, I must give my all to ensure that I am fully in alignment with Gods will for the church. If I am to fail, not only do I fail myself, but I fail God and many of the youths. WOW.
Ironically, a part of me lavishes at the challenge. What an opportunity, to work for the Lord Almighty. Really and truly, this isn't about me is it? If I can't deliver the goods, I'm sure God has another person to do the job (ala David to Samuel).
It means I have to fix up, I need to become more disciplined and focused, if not for my sake, then for the youth, for the church.
"Heavenly Father,
I commit myself to you Oh Lord.
I deliver myself as a sacrifice, just as you did for me.
You came and gave yourself up to death for my sake, now it's time to do the same for you.
I pray that I can one day be the man that you want me to be, that my will and yours Jesus may become one, just as you and The Father are one.
I commit myself to you Lord Jesus,
In Jesus name I pray.
Amen."
The Chronicles Of A Christian.
Hello to everyone who just happens to be reading this.
My name's Gideon (not my real name, unfortunately) and this blog is a dedicated journal of my walk in Christ Jesus my Lord, and the day-2-day movement of a young, "urban" Christian.
I'm not really into this whole diary-writing thing, seems to femenine for me (I know, I know) and thus never really had a journal in my lifetime. I guess this journal is more for my benefit than anything, to track my road to the end (or as far as this takes me) detailing my victories in Christ, down to my valleys in the shadow of death.
I'm a young (in my 20s), black Christian, located somewhere in London (that's all I'm giving out about me), and unlike most other Christian blogs, I plan to keep this going, for my own sake.
I started this because in the past couple of weeks, I have been chosen to become a leader at my youth church.
Accepting this role has made the light of God shine brighter than every before in my life. In doing so, the light has displayed my vast inadequacies as a human and as a Christian.
This blog is to chronicle my inadequacies, my struggles, my loves, my losts, my struggle with a day, my time of joy, and my time in the wilderness (oh how I do not look forward to those times).
I pray that this blog shall help me to express my heart, something I tend to stuggle with (just one of my inadequacies).
I'm actually looking forward to this...
My name's Gideon (not my real name, unfortunately) and this blog is a dedicated journal of my walk in Christ Jesus my Lord, and the day-2-day movement of a young, "urban" Christian.
I'm not really into this whole diary-writing thing, seems to femenine for me (I know, I know) and thus never really had a journal in my lifetime. I guess this journal is more for my benefit than anything, to track my road to the end (or as far as this takes me) detailing my victories in Christ, down to my valleys in the shadow of death.
I'm a young (in my 20s), black Christian, located somewhere in London (that's all I'm giving out about me), and unlike most other Christian blogs, I plan to keep this going, for my own sake.
I started this because in the past couple of weeks, I have been chosen to become a leader at my youth church.
Accepting this role has made the light of God shine brighter than every before in my life. In doing so, the light has displayed my vast inadequacies as a human and as a Christian.
This blog is to chronicle my inadequacies, my struggles, my loves, my losts, my struggle with a day, my time of joy, and my time in the wilderness (oh how I do not look forward to those times).
I pray that this blog shall help me to express my heart, something I tend to stuggle with (just one of my inadequacies).
I'm actually looking forward to this...
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